Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) are no pretty picture. The oozing, itching, burning, pus filled sores on your genitals… oh, that is gross! That is what may come to you when you fail to abstain. The society calls it sexual freedom when you engage in sex irresponsibly without considering the consequence. But one living with STD would not call that freedom. There are dozens of STDs. Some are deadly and some are incurable. The society’s solution to this is “safe sex.” Just give people condoms and they can go about having safe sex with STDs and unwanted pregnancies eliminated. Now ask yourself if that is the reality today. This solution the society has proffered is more an ideology than a reality. Safe sex with condoms is an illusion. We are swimming in the proofs:
- Females as young as 15 years get pregnant every year (children are now giving birth to children).
- Teens are coming up with STDs every year.
- Abortion is going on at an alarming rate.
Abstinence before marriage and fidelity after marriage is the guarantee for safe sex (and great sex). Who does not want this?
Another effect of premarital sex is the loss of the ability to discern. The hormone, oxytocin, is released in a mother when she breastfeeds her baby. This causes the woman to bond with her child. Oxytocin is also released when a woman has sexual intercourse. This causes the woman to be forgetful and decreases her ability to think rationally. It also causes her to form a strong emotional attachment with the man. So, in a similar way that she would bond with her child, she bonds with the man. As a result of this, she loses her ability to discern and may end up moving in with a man whom she would otherwise reject and may even marry him. This can cause her and any future children a great deal of pain. That a proper foundation for marriage is not laid by many couples before “sliding” into marriage can be linked to premarital sex.
Unmarried partners who are in love and are having butterflies in their stomachs hardly envisage a break-up until pregnancy arrives. The once happy partners become unhappy. They did not expect it even though they were having sex. A child who should bring happiness to them were they married now seems to bring unhappiness. Two unhappy partners make two bad parents. The child can suffer terribly in this situation. He may be left with one parent or can even be aborted.
The ability to love is truly inhibited when partners engage in premarital sex. This is because premarital sex stifles a young person’s ability to communicate properly and to think clearly about consequences. Rather than being preoccupied with self-development or the actualization of one’s purpose, the young person is preoccupied with the physical.
When married, one can start comparing her partner’s sexual performance to her previous experiences. This is how premarital sex causes sexual dissatisfaction. If she had waited, she would not have any past sexual experience to compare with. When we anticipate something in life, the waiting makes us appreciate it more when we get it. Sex is no different.
When we wait for sex till the proper time, our character and self-esteem is built. What we develop in the process leads to a godly life – self-control. If you do not abstain before marriage, chances are higher that you would have self-control as a problem in marriage.