Dealing with an Unbalanced Relationship

Woman and Man sitting

An unbalanced relationship is one-sided. You see a girl for instance giving all she has in a relationship, yet she is not getting as much love as she would love to get.

Let us go back to the purpose of a relationship. A relationship is meant for mutual appreciation, and also serves as a means to share your deep emotions with someone you love. There are people who are not looking for these in a relationship. They are after the transients – the car, the house, the money, and the likes. These can come and go and they are not bad in themselves for they serve a purpose. But some girls give priority to the superficial things over who the guy actually is. She throws herself all out for the guy with the illusion that she is in love. Well, the guy simply takes what she has offered and after he has seen it all, he feels bored. As a girl, you find yourself doing the chasing. I think the man should be the one who should actively do the chasing. The guy should seek and find a girl’s love. This is not to say that the girl should play too hard to get.

A man as a player dropped every girl he had had a relationship with after he got all the fun. He later met a girl who was indifferent about him. The girl cared less about his car and money. It turned out that the more uninterested the girl was towards this man, the more this had-been player chased her for who she was. The girl was not ready to compromise her values. This man ended up marrying the girl. Girls should not fall cheap.

There are girls who remain in a relationship after they have noticed something very bad about the guy. A girl was still crazy about her boyfriend whom she noticed was going after chubby girls including one in his compound. “I don’t know what to do” was what she said. She may not know but I sure know that what she needs to do is to wake up. Her self-worth has been compromised such that she does not see herself deserving better.

A girl cannot change a guy. That is too much pressure on herself and she is most likely to get frustrated. Having noticed an ugly character you cannot live with in a relationship, are you thinking of coping with it in marriage? If the man does not prove his love for you by the way he treats you, then you should seriously think about the direction that relationship is headed.

“Why am I in this relationship?” is a question everyone in a relationship should ask. It is true that the looks of a girl and her “endowments” can attract guys to girls. However they are superficial and cannot sustain a relationship. They will fade before the eyes of a guy. For girls who flaunt their curves and expose parts of their body in order to get a guy, they should realize that when they succeed, they do not really get a man, they get a predator. After he has contributed to their “depreciation”, he goes on to the next one.

Be rational about your decision to commit yourself to a relationship. You fall cheap and the relationship is likely to become unbalanced with you on the losing end.

I do not suggest you just walk away if you are in a one-sided relationship. Do not leave the other person in oblivion. It is mature to have an open communication with your partner. Be honest about it. Talk about the state of your relationship and the way you feel. If your partner loves you, (s)he will care about the way you feel. If (s)he does not make changes to give you the time, attention, and love you desire, then you really have to think whether you actually want to continue in the relationship. This is not an easy thing to do because of the emotional investment involved in a relationship. But a failed relationship is better than a failed marriage. You deserve more if you are not being treated right in a relationship. You see this clearly when your self-worth is intact.

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